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Cap'n Rosetta
My mom is such a stupid person sometimes. She has had an alcohol problem for many years now and has tried getting help but, everything so far has not worked for her so her solution is to lie to people and say she is still going to the counselor or AA when I KNOW she isn't. She stays home from work claiming she is "sick" when she is hung over which sucks because she does have bad health without the alcohol problem and uses that to her advantage. I live an hour away during the fall/spring for college and come home on the weekends because sadly I do not have enough money to pay for college/car/dorm on my own and the only way I can get money is if I come home so my family can give it to me and I actually love being home but, every now and then my mom tries to take advantage of me and make me co-dependent when I told her at her last rehab meeting I will NO LONGER aid her if she has any problems from drinking. I used to pick her up when she passed out and take her to bed and lie to my own family for her when she was too drunk to attend a get together but, my whole family knows what she has been doing all these years now and some people at her work do to. Why she still has a job, I don't know. I'm glad she is responsible enough to go most days but, she still has a problem. So just a few minutes ago before I started typing this blog, she starts screaming frantically and saying "HELP, I NEED A SPRITE! I'M GOING TO THROW UP AND I CAN'T SEE." so I just ignore her because I know if she is going to throw up, its because she has been drunk all day because she stayed in her room and never came down to eat, so that is her own damn fault.

Then she has the nerve to say because I refuse to help her that I never help her do anything. UMMM,ok I am still the one who goes grocery shopping for her when she is in pain, I have gone out of the way during my SCHOOL TIME to see her at the ER when she has been there for her drinking and I do chores around the house. Last time I checked, I'm only here a few days of the week, these are NOT my responsibilities and yet I still do them so don't you dare try to put me down while you are abusing yourself! She really is a bitch when she is drunk and I don't respect her at all. I'm pretty sure she can see just fine, she just woke up from passing out on her bed and had a panic attack and I think she just passed out again. I have tried everything to get her to go to Rehab the full time but apparently she doesn't respect herself or her family enough to go get the help. YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK HER FOR CAUSING ME TO HAVE SUCH HORRIBLE ANXIETY PROBLEMS. FUCK HER FOR USING ME JUST BECAUSE SHE PAYS FOR EVERYTHING FOR ME AND USES IT AGAINST ME WHEN SHE IS DRUNK. I'M GETTING A JOB THIS SUMMER SO SHE WILL HAVE NOTHING ON ME AND SHE CAN JUST CONTINUE HURTING HERSELF AND I WON'T HELP. Don't get me wrong, I do love the person she is when she isn't drunk but, this has gone on for almost 8 years and I'm tired of the emotional abuse it causes me. How dare she throw her self caused health problems on me.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU- I hope she stays asleep so I don't get harassed anymore tonight. I am trying to mind my own business like her counselor told me to last year and not let it bother me but, it just isn't that easy when all she wants to do is bother me and make me angry.

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I don't want to start a debate with anybody but, cannibalism seriously disturbs me. I watched this documentary called "I AM ALIVE" and it was about a plane crash in 1972 in the Andes Mountains and the survivors ended up having to make the decision after 27 days to eat the dead and IN THAT CASE, I do understand it because they discussed it for hours before actually acting upon it and related it to the Christian view of eating bread as god's flesh to make it feel less morbid. In that case, it was survival and was an uncomfortable decision to have to make so I understand it but, when I go on Tumblr and see people who want to try cannibalism just because, that is when I get disturbed with society.
For me, I have spiritual beliefs and I find burying/cremating someone to be beautiful and haunting. The ground will eventually decompose you and allow for plants and new life to grow and that is absolutely gorgeous to me and makes me a little more comfortable with death. The thing is, I actually have to make my mind block out when I eat meat from thinking that the thing I'm eating used to be alive. I REFUSE to eat something that still looks like a creature and when I've gone fishing, I catch and release.
I'm really against hunting unless absolutely necessary because in a survival situation I would rather shoot and eat a deer or catch a fish than eat my own leg or something.

Cannibalism is just too unmoral and for a society who has based itself on intelligence and morals and religion, I don't see why we should ever want to be a cannibal. Even the survivors from that flight didn't want to eat the corpses. It was a need, not a want. The only time I could ever be ok with doing this act is if I was a zombie which would mean I no longer had intelligence and had to listen to my survival instincts. If I ever was thrown in the situation where I had to eat a dead person to survive, I would have to wait a long time for my instincts to absolutely take over and hope that I had people who loved me with me and could talk me into believing what I was doing was moral. I'm not Christian and have no firm religious beliefs. My spiritual beliefs are from Hindu/Buddhist ideals and yes, I am aware that some people who practice those ideas do cannibalistic things but, I am all for the more peaceful, respecting life and death aspect they contain. Most Hindu's these days are vegetarian and I absolutely wish I could make myself be one too but, its hard to when your family doesn't understand why you strive for it.
I made it as far as eating only poultry and seafood when I had to eat meat but, was eventually talked back into eating pork and beef which I REGRET SO MUCH. At least poultry and seafood is healthier for you. Anyways, those are my beliefs on cannibalism and why I view it as morbid and not beautiful at all. Its fine if you disagree with me but, I am not asking for my mind to be changed and doubt you could do so. My beliefs on life and death make the world look beautiful to me despite all the grief and suffering animals, plants, and people endure. I realize we are no different than animals in biology but, we have proven we are more advanced in intelligence and meat is not the healthiest thing for you at all. Call me selfish but, if we ever have to live in a world where our resources are gone I will probably kill myself because NUMBER 1- IT WILL MORE THAN LIKELY BE HUMANS FAULT WE GET INTO THAT SITUATION ANYWAYS. NUMBER 2- I REFUSE TO LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE PEOPLE ARE SELFISH ENOUGH TO WANT TO SURVIVE IF IT MEANS WE HAVE RIPPED THE WORLD OF NATURAL FOOD AND WATER. THAT SOUNDS HORRIBLE AND I'D RATHER NOT WITNESS IT. So that is my very firm belief on the subject. Sorry, I've just been incredibly disturbed with humanity's opinion of it sometimes, so I would like to get my two cents out there as to why I view it to be immoral.

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This is my video after con! Sorry its so late! :b
If you want to see photos, hang tight! I need to post them all online still.
I do have some on my deviantart though, which if you have a deviantart you should add me!
http://blooburd10.deviantart.com/ Tada! ;)

Yay for short blogs! *runs around*

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So, if you read my last blog you know I have dealt with a hellish thing known as an ear infection for almost a month.
Well, I came back to school last week and my drive back to my college town of Denver was a scary POURING rain drive that I was not in the mood for at all as I had the stress of moving to deal with along with a numb mouth from getting 2 cavaties filled. Yeah, not fun....
I pretty much cried for half of my drive from feeling so overwhelmed. :(
Well, I finally got back to my dorms and my friends (roommate and 1 other friend) came out and helped me carry my stuff to my dorm so that helped calm my nerves. I then did pretty much all my unpacking that night and tried to get some sleep before my first day of school.
THAT WAS A FAIL.

I only got two hours of sleep and my stomach was so upset the next day from only having a smoothie the day before mixed with tons of meds. On top of that my first day was foggy and rainy and made me feel even worse. My ear was really being a jerk that day. So it wasn't fun but, I survived!

Then Thursday I got a breather and did some room decorating and started getting my stuff ready for *drum roll* Anime Con! :D I was so ready for it! I spent the rest of that night hanging out with my roommate and our friends playing pool and video games so yes, a huge improvement from Wednesday!
Finally, Friday rolls around and its time for me to drive to my friend's aunts and get ready for Anime Con!
I had so much fun at the con!
I was casual Robin the first day because I was too lazy to get in my actual costume lolol. XD;; I did however wear a utility belt I made myself!

Then the last two days I was Shinra from Durarara! and that was more fun than my Robin cosplay and weird enough, more comfortable than my casual cosplay. xD I did make an actual Robin costume but, it had some failures last minute, so I opted to be the same character for two days and I AM SO GLAD I DID because Sunday there was a Durarara! photoshoot!

SO YES, AMAZING FIRST TIME AND I WILL BE BACK! :D IF YOU GUYS WANT ME TO POST PICS, I CAN! I ALSO HAVE ONE VIDEO. ;) So yep.

Ear infection wise- ALOT BETTER but still going to see an ENT sometime in the next few weeks to make sure its healing for sure and getting my throat checked because of my god awful mucus gag reflex that I have been dealing with for years now. We just have never got me looked at about it but, might as well if I'm seeing an ENT.

Future plans- Mom is moving at the end of the month and I'll be 20 September 27th. So yep. BUSY INDEED.

Well I better stop blabbing so I can get my arse to class and then go back to my dorm finally!
BYEBYE FOLKS! :D

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Sorry I haven't been posting much.
I think I warned you people awhile back that I am a HORRIBLE blogger.
I'm mostly hear to see the genius of others.
ANYWAYS.
My summer that started in April has come to an end and I now face college life again.
However, was supposed to do that this week but you know who decided to pay me a visit two weeks ago while I was enjoying my late night music? A little b*tch called an ear infection.
I go into the doctor's four days later and they go "its Swimmer's Ear Infection" which is caused by bad pool water or just shit sneaking its way into your ear canal.
I pretty much gave up swimming awhile ago because I don't particularly enjoy it, so of course mine was caused by bacteria.
Was on the antibiotic ear drops for 7 days and guess what? My ear is still being a biotch! So I go back in for a second doctor's visit and they give me amoxicillian and do head adjustments because my head feels all congested,plus I had this bizarre lump on the back of my neck.
So I take that for a few days and still no damn improvement so they put me on the stronger ear infection meds which I finished a few days ago and I still can't hear well out of my left ear. I mean, I can hear but, its REALLY annoying when you talk out loud and can tell that side is all muffled.

SO I went back in one more time and they now had me do bloodwork which came back fine and dismissed this as a virus aka "ANTIBIOTICS DON'T WORK.YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN." So I had to miss my first week of school due to this BS and have been holding off my dentist appointment because I've been getting nausea spells with this crap that make me throw up when I try to brush my teeth. So yea, my teeth are "GORGEOUS" right now. *sigh*

Well lucky for me its labor day weekend and I'm off til next Tuesday but, that night I have to move back to the dorms and get on with life and go to a convention that weekend where i'm expected to cosplay.

^^;; Also inbetween all this my grandpa on my real dad's side passed away due to cancer last week and this last weekend my grandma got put in the ER due to high blood pressure.

I just have so many reasons to be happy right now. >:(

Keeping positive- My lump is gone, my ear doesn't feel like hot water is in it anymore but, still muffled, my grandma is on meds and doing better and headphones help my ears feel like nothing is wrong with them. So i've been continuing my nightly computer sessions.

The only issue I really have with this infection is sometimes I can't even eat (have been eating once a day,if at all) and I've lost about 10 pounds due to that. Hey, I know anyone can deal with a little ear problems but, when it affects everything else, life just sucks.
I even have sleeping meds now because I haven't been able to sleep some nights due to irrability and what makes this all fun is I have an anxiety disorder so my stress levels shoot all over right now.

;< I'm just praying life gives me a pick me up soon because i'm usually so optimistic but, its hard when things don't seem to change. I'm just happy I got to eat yummy pasta tonight that stayed down and go online and rant about things.

So theres a ridiculously long post from yours truly. Hopefully next time you'll read something happy from me.

Bye for now,
JNL

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Yes, I have done it.
Photoshopped myself to look like Beckett.
It frightens me how much his expressions and mine match. O__o
I def want a wig now though. I love editing pictures too!
Heres the scariness!








This last one is my favorite. xD Weird though right?
Yes, I'm aware the dimensions in these pictures aren't PERFECT but, I spent more than enough time trying to be accurate just by posing and wearing a blue overcoat, then coloring over it in photoshop so it became black on top of putting his wig onto my head and hat sometimes, adding the bow, and putting myself into a fitting background.

I was laughing so much making these, insanity I tell you!

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Hey!
I'm back people.
Well, I never really left, just haven't been active.
So I'm back into POTC right now. Haven't seen the new movie yet but my British smexies died in the last one so I know it won't be as exciting for me. :C I still love Jack and Barbossa though, so I won't be too disappoint, I guess.
Anyways, I'm not much of a writer, thats why I'm majoring in illustration because I create art to express myself.
Speaking of which, go look at all my new userpics! I LOVE doing photo manips and editing!

And if you want to talk to me about fandoms and what not, find me on FB- that70sshow102@yahoo.com, twitter-SturvingArteest, or just hit me up here because I will receive an email notification and will reply ASAP!

I wub joo all! :3

Peace out,
Cap'n Rosie

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I realized that communities on LJ are what keep me active here so my goal is to just get into a bunch of them.
Anyone know of any good Daft Punk or Gorillaz ones? :O
Please and thank you!
Your loving,
once again active,
Crazyname102!

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Its been awhile.
So whats new?
Well, alot actually.
But since people don't know me on here I'll make this short.
I'm a freshman in art college right now and finally animating stuff!
My major is 2d Animation so yea, its a big deal for me that I finally am doing what I love. :)
I actually want to be a character designer but, apparently this is the best way to go for that dream.
Anyways I'm bored writing.
Later~!

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Ok, so we all know conspiracys will continue to happen til humans die out. But.....is it wrong for me to I don't know.....think it so RIDICULOUS!
The one that has really got me speechless is the sixties rumor about Paul Mccartney dying in a car crash. Yet, this story changes often to things like oh no he just went into hiding and he worked behind the scenes and he had facial construction.
Maybe he did go into hiding for a brief time.....is that so wrong? We all need a break from our coworkers and well, the Beatles were just musical coworkers. Can you really blame the poor guy for wanting a break?

This "Faul" garbage is absolute bs though and I can't believe people STILL buy into it. Why is it so hard to believe maybe he gained a lil weight and wanted to change his haircut?
Do people who believe in this bull krap even THINK about the possibility? No, I think not because either you Fully believe he is the Paul still performing or not. I was a skeptic until doing reasearch from people who believe and don't believe and well, I rest my case on believing Sir Paul is the same Paul who has always been a Beatle. He really doesn't LOOK THAT DIFFERENT. so if this were true, they would have had to find a guy the same age, same hairstyle, same eye color, same facial expressions, same way of playing instruments. SURE, i believe in look alikes! I'm sure there is tons of them in the world, but not an identical twin who sounds like you and acts like you and EVERYTHING SO precise.

With the technology we have to today I'm sure there is an easy way to end this conflict of who is right and wrong. A few DNA tests? Fingerprints from different points in time? Someone would HAVE to have noticed change that has authority to make it official and so far these people have said the Conspiracy is a hoax! I'm afraid we won't ever know for sure til poor Paul dies but, at least he won't have to worry about this krap in the next life. Even when that famous autopsy is done, even if there is no DENYING he is the real Paul, these stupid non believers will continue to find some way of looking beyond it and saying shit like "OH, well.....they just had super similar DNA!" or something stupid. I just hate people who deny everything when they don't even think about the possibility.

YES I have done ALOT of research before doing this and honestly I started to believe the hoax being true until I realized half the sites that tried to bring it about as reality were blogs and unreliable and half the ones about him being alive and well were official certified sites. Above all it just irritates me that people can say crap like that. Things like the american government was responsible for 9/11 and the holocaust never happened and so on and so forth. Where are these people's minds? In fantasy land where anything they say becomes a reality? I don't know. I wish I did.

Oh even, Paul said in an interview last year that people even thought he died because on the cover of abbey road he is wearing no shoes so they thought he died of "scorched feet". I mean come on! Leave the poor guy alone! OMG. I'm just saying the accusations would almost be believeable if they weren't so ridiculous in changing the way he died or got facial surgery or works behind the scenes so frequently. The he never died thing stays consistant and thats why I choose to believe it!
Peace out,
Me! :) (Or did I die in a crash too and someone hacked this account....? Conspiracy! :O)

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